A group of friends going through mid-life crises decide to head to the Brazilian rainforest and remake their favourite childhood movie, Anaconda. Unfortunately for them though, they find themselves in the movie they are trying to remake. 

I genuinely thought that Anaconda was a genius idea as I headed into the cinema to watch this high concept comedy. As the credits rolled and I left the theatre I wondered if I was wrong and that the idea was terrible or if it was just awfully executed. Because this Anaconda movie was as dull as the original 1997 feature that they are lovingly sending up. 

The idea is crazily simple. A group of old school friends who once shot a short horror feature called “Squatch” get together for one of their birthdays and commiserate on their “B to B+” lives. Doug (Jack Black) had dreams of being a film director but now directs wedding videos. Ron (Paul Rudd) is a failed actor who has just managed to get fired playing the role of Doctor #3 in a TV show. Kenny (Steve Zahn) is a cameraman who was fired by best friend Doug because he is an alcoholic. And Claire (Thandiwe Newton) is going through a divorce. So when Ron suggests they try to realise their dream and shoot a remake of Anaconda they jump at the opportunity. 

What happens from here though fails miserably at every turn. 

Jack Black and Paul Rudd who are the stars of the show and are normally capable of delivering laughs from almost any scenario somehow fail to click in any way and barely deliver a titter. 

Thandiwe Newton is given so little to do in the film I genuinely felt embarrassed for her. At most the film tentatively hints at an unrequited love between her character and Rudd’s character but it is so thin it barely registers. 

None of the scenarios deliver any real belly laughs and the subplots involving gold mining that involve Ana (Daniela Melchior) may as well have been cut from the film for as much interest and engagement that they provide. 

The cameos that are so obviously coming even fail to register a chuckle. 

And to cap it all off, because this is a comedy with a 12A rating there is absolutely zero horror and zero thrills. In fact the CGI snake, in keeping I suppose with the fictional characters’ budget looks terrible.

An abject failure.